Disillusioned

Well, well, well…it’s been a while!

I’ve been drowning in work responsibilities and haven’t had a spare moment to even think about blogging. But today’s the day I dust off my keyboard and spill my guts. If you’re hoping for a helpful or hopeful or educational post, you might try finding one on Google; ‘cuz this is not that. Not today anyways.

Days like today chip away at my love and passion for my job.  Or should I say… WEEKS like this.

I’ve had a series of frustrating events happen at work that have burst my bubble on this whole career. Parents who distort reality and make ridiculous accusations. Parents who refuse to implement strategies. Endless reports and corrections and revisions and deadlines. Unbearable number of mandatory meetings (that I’m not paid to attend).

At the end of the day…. I chose a job in ABA for one reason, and one reason only…. to learn everything I can in order to help my brother. Along the way I’ve been able to help dozens of children and families. And that’s amazing! But that’s really a fringe benefit and a huge bonus in my quest to help Dylan. The real prize is having years of training, and experience, and education about how to best serve my brother.

And with the exhausting, punishing, maddening past couple of weeks that I’ve suffered through… I’m just deflated. I feel disenchanted and disillusioned with my job.

I’ve worked reeeeeeally hard to get where I am in my career. And, I don’t honestly plan to forsake it all. But, it’s awfully tempting to throw my hands up and say “Alright, it’s been nice knowin’ ya! I’m out!!!”

Hoping next month is better…. Hoping to get back my zeal for my job. I know it’s still in there somewhere. I know what I do for a living has the power to change lives…. and I’m incredibly blessed to have my job…. I guess that’s what I need to focus on…